Couple on video call

To a Successful Long Distance Relationship – The Ultimate Guide

~Debanjana Dutta

Getting into a relationship is easy. But maintaining is the hardest part. And if, it’s a long-distance, be sure that your hardships just increased exponentially.

“One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life. That word is love.”

Sophocles

No! Don’t you worry. We are here for you, with the Ultimate Guide to a Successful Long Distance Relationship.

LDRs – An Overview

There are basically two types of long distance relationships.

Firstly, the relationship that starts traditionally and then one of the partners has to relocate temporarily (for a job or family issues). At that point of time, the relationship undergoes the much dreaded, ‘long distance’ phase.

On the other hand, there is a second type of LDR, which starts officially as a long distance relationship, right from the beginning.

Now, the first one is easy to understand. It’s temporary and well, no one foresaw this ‘sudden change’.

But what about the relationship that starts as a long distance? Why do couple do it?

It only happens when you meet someone, you feel so connected physically, emotionally and spiritually. You don’t even give it a second thought.

The feeling is so weird and urging that you agree to do anything that makes it work.

So if you are in either of these situations, you are in the right place.

Tips for a Successful Long Distance Relationship

Here are some tips for you to make that Long Distance Relationship work, FOREVER!

1. Believe in Your Relationship

Unlike the traditional relationships, couples in a long distance relationship always have to deal with family and friends who believe that a LDR is crazy.

According to them, it is not sustainable and even heart ranching. To be honest, they have a point.

Relationships are hard enough. And in a long distance relationship, lack of physical contact and travelling expenses to meet just add up to the headache.

But when a couple believes in their relationship, the advantages are far more than the disadvantages.

2. Focus on the Quality of Communication Over Quantity

Many couples think that they need to compensate the distance by communicating more. So they engage in texting, all day long.

But when you do that, it becomes more difficult to enjoy your day. This is because you are constantly wishing to be together.

Moreover, your conversations will start to get boring. This will make things worse.

Instead, focus on the intent of the conversations where you invest in quality conversations. This will create stronger bonds between you and your partner.

So if you have daily bed conversations for instance, spend a little time in it by sharing about the best or the important parts of your day.

That will help you make sure that you engage in the most important, intimate conversations, no matter how far apart you both are.

So if you try hard to factionalise intimacy, your efforts will certainly pay off, in the form of a stronger bond.

Long Distance Relationships Holding Hands

3. Have a Long Term Plan

As a matter of fact, long distance relationships are much more unsatisfying and stressful when they are supposed to be temporary.

In other words, having a long goal of living together at some point in the future makes it much easier to work together, to get through the tough times.

So if you are in a long distance relationship or planning to be in one, make sure that you have the ending in mind.

Because without a plan, it will be a wastage of time and emotions. If neither of you can see yourself living together in the future, then the relationship is as good as dead.

So, you and your partner must have an end in mind. Its better to talk about it and make sure that both of you are on same the page.

4. Know Each Other’s Schedule

Different time zones, work schedule or sleep preferences can make communication challenging.

That’s why knowing each other’s schedule is important. Its always helpful to know whenever the other person is busy or free.

This is the only you can make a proper conversation at the right time. Obviously you don’t want to disturb your partner when he or she is busy or resting.

This gives you another opportunity to support and encourage each other.

5. Always have the Next Visit Planned

Visits are the best and the most exciting part of every long distance relationship.

After all the waiting, you finally get to meet each other, feel all those little things like holding hands, kissing, cuddling (and what not).

In normal relationships, most couples take these for granted. But they can be very special for the people in a long distance relationship.

So visit as often as possible. Start making plans often that gives you something concrete base to look forward to. Don’t let the fire die.

6. Patience and Trust

When you are wrapped up in a relationship, it is hard to admit the fact that your partner has a whole different life.

And as much as you would like to spend time talking on the phone with each other, you got to be on time for work.

Sometimes you may not even have a conversation for one full day. But when you do, make sure you talk your heart out.

Besides patience, you need to trust each other. Not only in a romantic relationship, but in all kinds of relationships, trust is the foundation.

And it is one of the biggest challenges when you live far apart. So keep trusting and be patient with each other. And your bond would only get stronger with time.

Couple

7.Embrace Your Independence and Focus on Yourself

Being in a long distance relationship forces a couple to spend 24 x 7 on the phone.

Yes, it can be lonely but you can use that loneliness to motivate yourself to get stuff done and to focus on your goals.

While you are doing that, you will begin to be a stronger and a confident person.

Again, focus on the things that will be beneficial to you and your relationship in the long run. 

So, pick up your hobbies, spend quality time with friends and family.

Appreciate your relationship. Many people start losing their relationships as they try to change themselves to what their partner wants them to be.

So self love is important and it will ensure that the relationship stays healthy.

8. Do Things Together When You are Apart

Due to advanced technology, long distance couples can spend more face time with each other.

So to make time more engaging, try to watch movies or play games together online.

This will help to bring creativity within your relationship and help you spend a lively time.

Last but not least, spending more quality time together will make you relaxed and make the relationship happening and lively.

In the end…

The present generation is obsessed with hook-ups, relationships and breakups.

People today cherish the fact that they are in a relationship rather than actually committing to the relationship. No doubt ‘breakup’ and ‘move-on’ are more common words today than loyalty and trust.

At the end of the day, we have to admit that all relationships have ups and downs.

When talking about long distance relationships, ups and downs are far more in number than in a normal relationship.

So it is best to clam up yourselves and focus on the fact that you both love each other and there is no other option other than making your relationship last forever.

Anupam Kundu
A professional blogger and an IT freak. The atypical combo of a Civil Service aspirant and a Tech enthusiast.